Lovin' life the hard way....

332 unread posts.... *sigh*

Life is reaching the brink of overwhelmedness. I feel bad even writing this, having not read much in the blogosphere lately.

I think I mentioned this earlier, but I fired 2 of my supervisors a couple weeks ago. While that in itself has proven to be surmountable, it's not very comfortable knowing that I'm the backstop now. My stress level has risen and I've let it influence my contact with people here at work. Not a good thing...

Work is picking up though. Couple that with the pressure that we're expected to at least break even for the next 4 months, and make enough profit to make up for the losses so far, is just adding to the stress. My influence over how cost effective we are is pretty big and having only been in a position like this for a couple years, with absolutely no direct guidance from anyone... *sigh again*. I've come to the expectation that almost all my life lessons will be learned the hard way. I'm sure it will pay off down the road, but sheesh...

Still not sure what's going on with my wife. I really don't understand how she expects me to be a good husband when she continues to do those things that set off all sorts of alarms. How affectionate do you really expect me to be when you wake me up at 5:30 am after just getting home from doing who knows what with who knows who??!! Yes, I am putting up with it for now. I have 3 little girls to consider first. I'm kind of hoping she'll get sick of that too and pull her head out. She seems unwilling to start at ground zero, which is exactly what both of us need to do if this is going to work.

Then I did the math for my checking account wrong last month. Very wrong. It set me back at least a half a month and my creditors have absolutely no patience. I usually pay all my bills on time, but when I don't, it sure hits the fan.

Ever read the 'footprints in the sand' poem? (Don't know the author or the real title...sorry.) I see one set right now. God's carrying me. But I certainly haven't been appreciating it like I should. "I can do every thing through Him who gives me strength." Phillipians 4:13.

Eliminating unrealistic expectations, making decisions for eternity, and thinking of others. That's what my life should be about right now. Not really sure how I'm doing with that. I can hope to see some blessings in this life, but I can't expect it.

Well, I lied. I know I'm not doing very well with that...