Taking stock for 2010

It's the beginning of a new year, so let's take stock...

- All 3 girls are fairly healthy. A couple have a cough right now but no major health issues. Add that to the 'good' side of the scale.

- I'm healthy too. My metabolism sure isn't as robust as it used to be, but hey, I'm 30, not 20 anymore. One more for good.

- I have a good job. A job I enjoy. We're not terribly busy, but things are looking up. Another for 'good'.

- I live in Wyoming. Not necessarily 'good', but it's pretty 'gud'.

- After putting gas in my wife's behemoth, I have all of $12 in the bank until Monday. It's only up from here! Good.

- Probably the best good thing of all; God continues to work on me. He's blessed me immensely in handling situations that would have made me pretty angry before. Anymore I'm usually incredulous and at the best of times, just perplexed. Good. (but could be better)

- I've met a few very godly and uplifting men that I know God is using to break me down and remake me. I certainly wouldn't be the man I am today without their help. Good.

- I still struggle with things. Personal things I won't share here, but the frequency at which those things show up is greatly reduced. Another blessing from God. Good.

- The marriage is still crummy. She continues to do unhealthy things to get my attention, according to her. (I think we're not in gradeschool anymore...?) But she did quit her job and should be able to go to church with us now. Mostly bad, but maybe I'll just leave the bad parts off the table...

- I began the year in prayer. (It was a very short prayer as I'm surprised I even stayed up that late.) Good.

So what's the score?

I spent last night by myself. Even though my girls and wife were downstairs. My wife came up to me earlier in the night and asked if I was happy with our lack of affection. If there is such a thing as 'super incredulous', I was it. I didn't get angry but it blew me away that she expected me to be affectionate with her. It really has nothing to do with whether or not I'm happy with our current situation, I'm not, but what does she expect when she admittedly pushes my buttons? So my response was a blast of perplexity. If you don't know what that sounds like, it's pretty much a "HA!".

So needless to say, my thoughts about that particular encounter are kind of overwhelming right now. I see all the great and good things that God has blessed me with and thank Him for them. I also see the trial that God has given me in regards to my marriage. Without that trial, I'm sure I wouldn't have grown as I have this year.

So what's the score?

It's all good.